We Never Gave Up! Ten Years After Wraparound

Parents, Jean and Dameion, and their kids, Kobe (23), Kayla (18), Karisa (17), and Kasndra (13), along with Kalisese, the dog and Jade the bearded dragon found comfortable seats in a circle in their living room. Everyone was excited to share. I immediately felt welcome in this amazing family’s home. I noticed an entire wall of pictures depicting gatherings and events with Dameion and Jean’s wedding picture featured in the center.

To begin, the family took a moment to reflect on what it was like having Wraparound in their lives ten years earlier. The mom, Jean, was the first to speak. She recalled the fear and anxiety she had when she reached out to Child Protective Services (CPS) for help with their oldest child, Kobe. Kobe was then placed in a group home, causing his three sisters to fear that they might also be removed from the family. Jean questioned CPS, asking why their family couldn’t be trained like a therapeutic foster home so Kobe could be reunited with his family.

And then: It happened via Wraparound!

The family was skeptical about Wraparound at first, but they were happy to discover it was much different than they’d originally thought. Initially, apprehension and fear were hard to overcome, but quickly the family developed trust in the Wraparound staff. Slowly, changes came about and the family’s future looked hopeful. Everyone learned skills and tools, and communication became a big focus.

“Wraparound became an extended family”, Jean shared. “They were supportive, gave us confidence and helped us find our voices.”

“We felt accepted,” Dameion added. “They made us feel like we could fix it and gave us the tools and resources we needed to move ahead.” 

Kobe, the main recipient of Wraparound services in the family, said that with the support of Wraparound, he had the opportunity to try out his new skills that he learned in his group home. Everyone practiced communication.

Kobe explained, “I learned how to tackle hard things, share my feelings and ask for what I needed.” He also spoke fondly about his Wraparound Youth Partner who helped him overcome obstacles, stating, “He didn’t give up on me.” 

Wraparound became an extended family. They were supportive, gave us confidence and helped us find our voices. 

Jean felt that her Family Partner, Ebony, made the most difference.

“She fought for us. I never felt alone or judged,” she said. “Ebony became part of our family. She was there when we needed her even when we didn’t think we did.”

Kasndra, the youngest sibling, was only 3 years old when Wraparound was in their lives and does not remember the specifics, but recalls feeling safe and looking forward to the Wraparound Team arriving to their home.

I asked the family if they felt Wraparound continued to make a difference ten years later. Overall, the family says they have closer relationships, feel safer to share things with each other more and emphatically embrace the meaning of family. Jean added, “We’re together and thriving!”

Each had something to add from their perspective:

• Dameion said he feels he’s a stronger person, able to believe in himself and takes pride in his family. “I feel confident I can take care of my family. I have learned how to speak up!” He’s looking forward to traveling with his wife and exploring life. The oldest, Kobe, said he learned how to feel empathy, care about others and manage his feelings. He shared “It’s okay to make mistakes. I’ve learned how to recognize and change it. I’ve become a stronger person.” Kobe is looking forward to his new married life, traveling with his wife and exploring new beginnings.

• Kayla feels she gained the confidence and trust to talk freely with her family. “Our communication is open, and I am able to explore new opportunities that I thought were barriers. I can explore different outlets and take a deep breath,” she explains. Kayla believes she’s headed down the right path and is thinking about college. She wants a career helping people, giving people second chances they deserve and the opportunity to realize their dreams.

• Karisa found she can express herself with art and wants to use that in some way. She says she’s able to see challenges as blessings or lessons, building on the future.

• The youngest, Kasndra, feels Kobe returned home at the right time and is an example to her of positive change. Now 13, she is future-oriented and already thinking about honors classes in high school. She is also thinking about colleges, aiming for ones that will provide her with the best opportunities in marine biology, her current passion.

• Jean feels that without Wraparound, she would have given up and lost hope. But with its help, she was able to rise above through the acquisition of skills, tools and resources. She shared that she became a better parent through determination, utilizing support and by finding and learning how to use her voice to make a lasting impact. 

Jean once told her Family Partner, Ebony, “One day, I’ll have your job”.

And that day has come. She earned her college degree and is proudly employed as a Family Partner with the same agency who helped her when she needed it.

“I can’t tell you how [much] my lived experience provides comfort and hope to the families I work with,” she shared. “It’s amazing to see them step up, find their voice and take back their family!”

“One Day I Want to do Your Job!” A Ten-Year Retrospective

Read more of Jean’s journey her self-penned companion article.

Jean added, “My work with families is challenging, but I know they will make it!” She feels that Ebony made all the difference for her and hopes to carry on that work.

My time with the family had come to an end, and I couldn’t help but feel inspired and renewed. I am reminded of how the dedicated people of Wraparound provide support, give hope and a voice to the most vulnerable families, reminding them of their strengths. I am excited to return to this family again in ten years to discover all the amazing things they have gone on to accomplish.

 

Read additional articles from this issue of the Wraparound Connections Newsletter!